Friends & family plant tree in memory of Elon student

Dozens of people gathered on Aug. 29, 2015, in the Danieley Neighborhood to celebrate the life of Trent Stetler, a Pennsylvania native known for his infectious smile and countless friendships across campus.

Trent Stetler was remembered on Saturday for many things: his “goofy outfits” and boisterous singing, his love for his parents and younger sister, his ability to make everyone in a group feel included.

He was remembered for being “the best kind of friend imaginable.” And Stetler had many, many friends.

The Elon University community celebrated Stetler’s legacy on Aug. 29, 2015, in a Danieley Neighborhood tree planting ceremony that featured just as many laughs as tears when speakers shared stories of a classmate who took his own life in January.

“I love to tell Trent stories. Although most of them would embarrass him too much to be shared today, he lives on through all of us, through the stories that we tell and the memories that we share,” said Elon senior Rebecca Tillem, a management major from Randolph, New Jersey, and Stetler’s girlfriend. “Now that he is gone, I choose, as I hope you all do, to remember him the way he would have wanted, the happy go-lucky-kid with a goofy grin and full heart.

“I choose to think about all the value he has added to my life, not just through memories, but through the family he has left behind in all of you.”

The gathering in front of the Danieley K building brought together more than 100 people, including Stetler’s parents, Jim and Denette Stetler of Havertown, Pennsylvania, and his sister, Kylie. “We just can’t thank you all enough. This is an incredible tribute,” Jim Stelter said. “You’ve touched us in a way that will be with us forever.”

Stetler majored in economics with a minor in communications and was active in the men’s rugby club. He served as an intern with the Phoenix Club and was also a member of Alpha Kappa Psi professional business fraternity.

Nicholas Cianciara, a senior finance major from Basking Ridge, New Jersey, led efforts to have a tree planting in Stetler’s memory. Cianciara said the planting was a way to bring closure to a tight-knit group of classmates who loved Stelter more than their friend realized.

“There were tears today, but everyone is leaving happy, which was the goal,” Cianciara said. “He’d be thrilled with the amount of people who think of him they way they do.”

Other friends offered their own reflections after the program. “Check on your friends,” said Elon senior Jake Battersby, an entrepreneurship major from Holliston, Massachusetts. “The mind is a lockbox and you never really know what someone is thinking.

“Trent was a happy guy. We just never saw this coming.”

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Anyone who would like to talk about their feelings of loss or concern for others may contact Counseling Services at 336-278-7280 or the Truitt Center for Religious and Spiritual Life at 336-278-7729. Counselors are available after hours on call by contacting Campus Safety and Police at 336-278-5555. The Student Life administrator-on-call may also be reached at 336-278-5555 at any time.